


Inner Thoughts

by StarGazerGamer



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Snark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-28
Updated: 2017-06-28
Packaged: 2018-11-19 23:34:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11324040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarGazerGamer/pseuds/StarGazerGamer
Summary: I'm rubbish with thinking up titles.  Sara and Lexi examine their feelings and inner thoughts about if a relationship would work or not.  Set prior to the final push on Meridian.





	Inner Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [spookykingdomstarlight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spookykingdomstarlight/gifts).



Sara looked up from her data pad with a snap, something or someone was watching her. Her blue eyes scanned the area but she didn’t see anyone in the meeting room, but that tingle didn’t leave the back of her skull. She tried to shake it off but too long in Andromeda made her put stock in that feeling. Her legs stretched out in front of her as she set the data pad down on the small table beside the couch. “SAM, was anyone watching me?”

 _The only one was Dr. T’Perro, Pathfinder._ SAM’s familiar mechanical voice rolled around in her head as she thought on his words. She could understand Lexi’s concern, she did _technically_ die on the Archon’s ship. Sara figured it was just practical to keep an eye on any potential side effects from having the AI that was bonded to her physiology literally kill her. Especially that lecture that had followed once she and the others had gotten back on the Tempest. Sara hadn’t been the biggest fan of it herself, but it was preferable to letting the Archon have his way. Sara ran a hand through her dark brown hair, she’d kept it down today, looking at the ends and frowning. Split ends, great. Hopefully the Initiative had someone that could give a decent haircut once this was all over with. Sara blew out an impatient breath and stood up to pace the room. _Pathfinder._ SAM’s voice began but Sara shook her head.

“I’m fine SAM. Just… Restless I guess.” Sara leaned on the railing that overlooked the research room. She saw Drack bickering with Vetra, the argument being about some asari matriarch credit scam on Kadara. The smile tugged at her lips as she heard how fed up Vetra sounded with the old krogan. Sara looked down at Lexi, her eyes scanning the asari’s amused face. She’d tried flirting with Lexi before, but the doctor brushed her off. Sara had taken the rejection well, but it had still stung. Peebee had hinted at a casual fling but that hadn’t interested the human Pathfinder. She wanted something that could be a bit more solid, no matter how hot the sex may have been. None of her crew pulled her as much as Lexi had, Sara figured it must’ve been the quiet nature Lexi had. Not that she hadn’t tried of course, but no one had snagged her attention or interest. Liam was just a bit _too_ impulsive for her, Vetra treated her as a little sister and Sara liked having the close friendship with her, and screwing it up with romance never entered her mind. She loved the turian as if she was her sister, same with Sid. Jaal’s laugh turned Sara’s head and she thought about the angaran. He was an excellent friend and she would not find anyone better to replace him on the battlefield, but the angara were just a little _too_ in touch with their emotions. Sara was a bit more reserved with her affection, and she was embarrassed far too easily. Sara watched as Lexi headed towards the cargo bay, which meant she was going back to the medical bay. She just liked watching the woman move, there was a purpose in her steps, and wasn’t ashamed to admit it to herself at least. Well and SAM too.

 _Pathfinder, it is time for your scan by Dr. T’Perro_. SAM informed her as she blew out an irritated breath. Much as she enjoyed Lexi’s company, these scans were getting to be too much. Despite the truce engineered between Lexi and SAM, it seemed like Sara kept getting more and more scans to ensure SAM hadn’t messed with her anymore. Sara grumbled as she headed down to the medical bay, pulling her hair back into a ponytail as she walked down the meeting room ramp. She waved at the greetings thrown out by Vetra and Drack. Her trip to the med bay was relatively uneventful, for once, and she wondered what was going on with the ship. The med bay door slid open with a small hiss and Sara gave Lexi a flamboyant bow. “I’m here on the condition there are no needles involved this time.”

“And if there are?” Lexi’s droll tone was not lost on Sara. The grin curved Sara’s lips as she walked into the lab, a bounce to her step. She always felt better after hearing Lexi’s voice, and never questioned it. It was comforting to be near her. A quiet moment in an otherwise storm of hurricane proportions, better known as Andromeda.

“Then be gentle!” Sara grinned as Lexi shook her head. She motioned for the Pathfinder to sit on the table. Sara decided to be cheeky this time. “Clothes on or off?” Her eyebrows wiggled for extra amusement. Lexi sent an exasperated glare at her but Sara caught a quick flash of something that was decidedly _not_ irritation in her hazel eyes. Sara paused in surprise as she tried to puzzle out what could have been in Lexi’s eyes or if it had just been wishful thinking.

 _Dr. T’Perro’s heart rate increased for a few moments Pathfinder._ Sara could kiss SAM for that news. Well, if it was possible anyway. _It is not. Please refrain Pathfinder._ And SAM could read her thoughts now. Sara didn’t want SAM to constantly scan Lexi, it felt like cheating that way. If there was to be anything there, it would be without SAM’s help. Sara climbed up onto the table and held still for the scan. Her blue eyes caught Lexi’s light hazel ones, and the doctor darted them to the side under the pretense of looking at her omni-tool.

“Your endorphin levels are slightly elevated.” Lexi murmured as she read the scan results. Sara felt the flush on her cheeks as she knew why that was. Sara had to think of a quick reply and blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

“Well, I was looking forward to seeing you.” She almost slapped her face, smooth Pathfinder. Her eyes rolled heavenward as she cringed inwardly at her own embarrassment. Lexi’s amused chuckle broke through Sara’s embarrassed, self-deprecating thoughts.

“I stab you with a needle when you visit.” Lexi’s eyes twinkled with amusement. Sara laughed and rubbed the back of her head.

“Yeah well, most people I meet try to shoot me. I’d say the needle is a step up.” Sara shrugged as an embarrassed smile tugged at her lips. Lexi softly scoffed and reached for the data pad that had Sara’s results. “How bad is it? Do I need any more scans?” Sara asked hopefully and deflated at Lexi’s withering look.

“You’ve done well given what’s been thrown at you Sara. I just want to make sure you’re all right.” Lexi told her in concern. Sara tried her best not to get her hopes up at the concern, Lexi was a very dedicated doctor. The doctor to the human Pathfinder, it would most likely reflect badly on her if something happened to Sara. Twice dying, did _not_ count.

“Aww, that sounded like you care about me!” Sara grinned impishly at the asari doctor. Lexi paused for a moment, and Sara swore her skin flushed. Sara was surprised at the blush. She was unsure of what to say now, her own heart was racing in her chest. Nerves lodged a lump in her throat and she found she just couldn’t say what she wanted to. When she so desperately wanted to ask if there was anyway Lexi could feel the same way about her.

“Ryder. We’re landing at Khi Tasira.” Kallo’s voice interrupted the awkward moment between pathfinder and doctor.

“Right. Thanks, Kallo.” Sara told him as she hopped off the table. “Well, duty calls Lexi. Let’s go and activate Meridian.” The bright smile had Lexi responding in kind. It was hard not to smile when Sara had that look about her. Lexi just couldn’t shake the feeling something was going to go wrong.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“We’re on our way to Meridian now.” Suvi told Sara as the pathfinder sat in her quarters. Her entire body felt as if a fiend threw her against the side of a Remnant monolith. The Archon taking SAM and then Scott had taken its toll on Sara’s body and mind. Third time was definitely _not_ the charm when it came to dying. Though she wasn’t sure if she had technically died that time, but it had certainly felt like it. Kallo was taking them to Meridian, and was going to get Scott and SAM back, and kick in the Archon’s teeth while she was at it. Her fists clenched at the helplessness that rushed through her, the agony at not being able to _do_ something right then. Patience had never been one of her virtues. She had just thrown a tablet at the coffee table when her door opened.

“I can see you have your usual spirit back.” Lexi murmured as she saw the anguish on Sara’s face. It cut at her to see the pain in the younger woman, and she’d experienced so much in so little time. As fascinating as Lexi found it on an intellectual level, she found she’d grown to care for Sara. In a more personal, meaningful way. The kind of way she swore she’d never go through again. There was something in Sara that drew people to her, as shown by the motley group that made up the crew of the Tempest.

“Sorry. I was just…” Sara trailed off because she couldn’t think of how to explain how she felt. She sat down on the couch and her shoulders slumped in defeat. She held out an arm to Lexi. “Go ahead. I won’t even complain this time.” It took Lexi a moment to realize Sara was talking about an exam.

“I’m not here as a doctor, Sara. I’m here as your friend. Going through the trauma you did…” Lexi trailed off as she saw Sara’s face shuttered. Surprise flickered across her face as the pathfinder turned her head, the anguish hidden behind a façade of calm.

“I’m all right Lexi. Well, I’ll be better when I get my brother and SAM back.” Sara mumbled as she turned and looked out at the stars winking past. She didn’t need to talk about what happened, she just needed to stew for a bit. Lexi walked over to the couch and sat beside Sara.

“Sara, you can talk to me.” Lexi murmured as she saw the warring emotions in those familiar blue eyes. She felt the tug at her heart as she realized that she wanted Sara to feel better. Wanted to be the one to make her feel better. Sara had shown amazing courage and fortitude throughout the adventures in Andromeda, and had brought the Initiative together. Whether anyone was willing to admit it or not, Sara was the reason they were still going. Lexi brushed a hand over the back of Sara’s hair, always marveling at how soft it was. She tried to find the words and reasons why she should fight. It was unprofessional, Sara was only twenty-two and Lexi was two hundred and seventy-five, and there was no time for either of them to become involved with a relationship.

“I don’t need a therapist right now Lexi.” Sara winced at the words, she wasn’t normally one for lashing out when hurt. She was tired of being brushed off as not serious by the asari and just didn’t need any more torture. Sara wasn’t strong enough now to keep her emotions in check. “I’m sorry. That was…” Sara paused to take a calming breath. “I shouldn’t lash out at you just because I’m feeling hurt.” Lexi’s fingers continued to stroke her hair. “I… I want you as more than a friend and my doctor, Lexi.” Those long, beautiful fingers stilled in her hair. “I know you can’t give more and I’ve basically accepted it.” Sara mumbled as she hugged her waist. She had to be clear with Lexi, and get her feelings off her chest. Without SAM, she was floundering and hoped she didn’t screw it up.

“Sara.” Lexi began to explain but a thought hit her. Her reasons for wanting to avoid relationships were valid, she’d thought it over thoroughly. But this woman, this incredibly strong woman, was telling her that she cared. Lexi found herself torn inside, and she looked down at Sara’s face. It ultimately came down to one fundamental thing. Would she regret never giving this a chance, no matter how brief it would be? Lexi discovered the answer was yes, she would regret it. “I can’t promise anything. But, we can see where this goes.” Lexi smiled gently as she watched her words register with Sara.

“Wait. You mean? You’re willing to give me, us, a chance? Despite the whole swearing off relationships?” Disbelief colored Sara’s tone was she stared at Lexi in surprise. Lexi’s chuckle rolled over her, soothing the tension that had tightened in her stomach.

“I’m not promising anything. We could very well find we aren’t compatible you know.” Lexi reminded her with a playful smirk. She saw the red spread across Sara’s face and she laughed as the human pathfinder tried to cover her face in embarrassment. “Sara, it’s all right.” Lexi gently brushed aside Sara’s hands to see the mortified flush on Sara’s face.

“Could.” Sara cleared her throat. “Could you stay with me until we get to Meridian?” Lexi felt her heart softening towards the pathfinder. The question was so fragile, it held all of Sara in it. She would stay with Sara, hoping Sara could get some sleep before she had to go into the inevitable fight with the Archon. Lexi had to keep the worry from her own voice as she realized that Sara could realistically not come back from that fight.

“Of course, I will.” Lexi stood and held out her hands to Sara. “On the condition that you get some rest please.” Sara nodded and put her hands in the asari’s. So much trust was placed into such a simple gesture, as Lexi gently tugged Sara up. Lexi eyed the untidy bed but it merely reflected the personality that Sara had. She was always in motion, there was rarely a moment when the pathfinder was completely still. The two women got comfortable on the bed, Sara snuggling into Lexi’s arms, her cheek pressed against her chest. Sara could hear her heart beating, a quiet, reassuring sound. Lexi brushed a hand down Sara’s back and listened for her breathing. It didn’t take too long for Sara’s body to relax and her breathing to deepen. The smile tugged on Lexi’s face as she recognized the signs of sleep in Sara’s body.

“Sleep well Sara.” She murmured against her hair. Soon enough she’d have to watch her go into battle, into danger again. Right now, they were surrounded by the lull of the Tempest’s engines, a soothing droning sound that relaxed Lexi. She gathered Sara as close as she dared without waking her and spent the time to Meridian breathing in her scent.


End file.
